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POSTED
26/10/11
BATTLEFIELD 3
EA
PS3 (also on Xbox 360, PC)
Quick
EA impersonation: “Our shootyshootybangbang game’s better than
yours, NYAHH-NYAHH!”. Quick Activision impersonation: “Our
shootyshootybangbang game’s better than yours, NYAHH-NYAHH!”.
Sigh. We love the smell of hyperbole in the morning.
Putting aside puerile trash talk, it’s not the games companies,
advertising megabucks nor reviewer scribbles about BF3 and
its Voldemort, MW3; the “victor” will ultimately be decided
by the public. Vive la revolution! BLAM! Fuck, nearly winged us.
S’pose we sounded a bit insurgenty there.
Anyway, superfluous opinionatedness time. Unsociable cherubs that we
are, go-go cliché-encrusted single player! But beware those of a
point-something-ammunitional-and-shoot-lots bent, for there’re more
rules than you’d likely encounter in the real army. Free roam?
Forgetaboutit! Maybe we’re too inquisitive, but rather than playing
boring follow-the-leader as demanded, we felt improvisey. Bad
player! Hell, explore a tad, leaving where BF3 wants you and
you’re killeded. Conform or die! Then there’s the bleurghy quicktime
button stabs – so 1983!
There are glitches. We even stood facing a foe, just staring. He
didn’t raise an eyebrow! Well, until we gave him a lead injection...
But things look ace – even the Middle Eastern land where white cars
with yellow fenders are the rage automotively. But back to point, if
you’ve itches to use initiative, single player will kill-scratch
them. Bummer.
Still, how many do Battlefield for soloness? Sociable types
will have a literal and figurative blast. It goes the 2 Unlimited
route – no-no, no-no-no-no, no-no-no-no, no-no there’s no limit
(well, essentially) - with a free-roaming smorgasbord to get hype to
the bang-bang-shoot-shoot rhythm with. 24 can team and rain grief
upon freedom-defiling scum (U-S-A! U-S-A!), with new destruction
sources regularly introduced.
Numbers time. People dig numbers, apparently. Solo? 7.5.
Multiplayer? 9.5. Rounded out? 8.5. But hey, make up your own minds.
That’s what free will’s about, and what all this fighting’s
supposedly for...
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