review
What's it all about?Tweet, tweet, tweet...Contact!Australian release dates
                 
                 
     

POSTED 12/10/14


CASTLESTORM: DEFINITIVE EDITION

Zen Studios



Have fun storming the castle!

Miracle Max’s farewell was meant positively, but when applied to CastleStorm, presented here in a ‘Definitive Edition’ which shoehorns in lotsa DLC and stuff, he’d have been taking the piss.

Well, unless you’re a real-time strategy junkie who digs tower defence with a spot of slashtastic action folded in. Yes, multitaskers will be in heaven here. However, those aiming to keep their stress levels below the threshold of myocardial infarction may wish to abstain.

Basically, you’re tasked by King Edgar to control his armies to protect the castle from marauding barbarians, Vikings, wolves, troll thingummies and more. This protection racket takes several forms. From Angry Birds-like fatoonging of arrows and assorted other catapultable objects of destruction, to sending troops to their inevitable demise, to going all timed Golden Axeistic mystical on the marauders’ buttocks, materialising amidst them and having a bloody big slash.

Let them steal your flag and schlep it back to their base and you’re stuffed. Well, you’ll have to start again.

It doesn’t all fit on screen, so you need to scroll the vista, manage an increasingly confounding array of weapons assigned to different buttons which also have sub-assignments, along with varying regeneration times just to stress you out more. You’ll also have to deal with some expected weapons not being available during some missions.

Then there’s multiplayer madness, overseeing extensions to your castle and side missions. The latter range from simple kill-the-baddies affairs to saving asses. Erm, of the donkey kind.

While those of a more arcade-playing bent will face frequent demise and even more frequent frustration, tacticians will have a field day flipping between menus, going all The Block on castles, testing structural integrity, deploying this weapon towards that enemy, managing upgrades, juggling human resources, crying “Wolf!” and cursing trolls, while also possibly performing a silly song and dance number.

Frankly, you’ll be swamped.

take me back to the start...

 



CLICK THIS!



CLICK THIS!



 

 

     
                 
                 
     
ALL WRITTEN CONTENT COPYRIGHT © AMY FLOWER 2008-2017. GAME IMAGES COURTESY OF RESPECTIVE GAMES COMPANIES.