CALL OF DUTY: BLACK OPS
We’d like to dedicate this review to Bob Gunnagunyadown of the
Northern Territory Gungunenmorgun tribe, who we’re reliably informed
is the sole person left on Earth that hasn’t picked up CoD:BO
So, this review’s a tad superfluous, we guess, but hey, that’s never
stopped us before!
As anybody – except perhaps Bob - knows, the Call of Duty
series has essentially become the biggest gaming success story ever.
Never underestimate peoples’ desire to kill, it would seem. But it’s
not just an ability to satiate bloodlust (and there’s some serious
gore here, often in super-slow-mo) that’s made the CoD games
so popular, it’s also the fact that, well, they’re really bloody
This latest instalment is no exception, as we delve into the type of
Cold War, Yanks versus Russkies stuff that always gets our boat
floatational. After a numerical thing that we first thought was this
week’s Tattslotto results, we discovered we’re a soldier named Alex
Mason who’s undergoing some pretty major torture-infused
interrogation. This triggers flashbacks, and kicks off 15
globetrotting levels that deftly meld real history with fiction.
We’d tell you more, but then we’d have to kill ourselves for being
Really CoD:BO is just a remarkably spiffy on-rails shooter,
but it’s done so electrically that it doesn’t matter – unless
on-rails shooters give you the shits, natch. If you want more
freedom you have two options. You can take your chances finding non-eejits
online (there’s even gambling now), or launch the bonus game which
we’ve spent WAY too much time on… Zombies! Yep, those scumbag undead
bastards are back, in what’s basically Capcom’s Dead Rising
without all the interminable cutscenes.
If you’re a fan of CoD then you’ll already have this. Bob, we
hope we helped you make up your mind.