POSTED 28/7/11


DEAD BLOCK

Digital Reality/Candygun Games
PS3/PSN (also on Xbox 360/XBLA, PC)

Bastard economic climate, this downturn thing’s stuffed. The once proud Village People – cop, cowboy, construction worker, Injun, biker and GI - are but a wispy shadow of their former gloriousness. Just the construction worker, a cop (and a chick no less – hello ‘YWCA’ we suppose) plus a ringer, the chunky kid from Pixar’s Up, remain. Sad, sad times.

This belt-tightened trio do star in their own game though, which we reckon should have been called 'You Can’t Stop the Muties'. But they went with Dead Block. Fnuh. Yep, you likely guessed correctly and would win the ham should a ham be up for grabs for guessing, it done be got zombies and shit.

Apparently the undead have been roused by the spirit of classic Elvisesque rock ‘n’ roll into some sort of B-movie heck (see what we did, keeping with the ‘50s theme there?). So they’re all comin’ to getcha with the shambling and the groaning and all. As defence you can block windows with old school wood and nails, freeze them with some sciencematific stuff then hit them with a hammer to shatter them and similar other non-hands-on kinda stuff. Try to stave ’em off all gung-ho hammerific and you’ll die quicker than Limahl at a Motörhead gig. Cue lame Guitar Hero rip-off and repeat.

Back to wood, you’ll soon be running short, so will have to play smash it up on furniture. The usual things yield lumber – bookshelves, chairs, tables, fridges... umm?!

Such sloppy-sloppy-bluck-bluck-ferdork-shnork-sloppiness is symbolic of most everything about Dead Block. If points were awarded for trying it’d score some, but when the result’s repetitive and no fun then those points would ultimately be pointless.

Go west, to San Francisco, to the YMCA, in the navy even. Hell, go anywhere, just not near this.

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