POSTED 10/9/13


DIABLO III

Blizzard
PS3 (also on Xbox 360, PC)

Please allow me to introduce myself. Lucifer, Satan, Beelzebub, dark prince, lord of darkness, antichrist, Voland, Iblis, Ned Flanders...

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Diablo III is essentially Gauntlet on steroids. Say the arcade classic equated to the Schticky infomercial, Diablo III is kind of The Ten Commandments comparatively. But with sticky things.

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Erm, whatever. Anyway, Diablo III is big – really big - but in essence it really is what Gauntlet was. Trundle around dungeons and such as any of a selection of character types, marauding your way to loot, glorious loot.

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Despite basically being an arcade romp, there’s a pimple of RPG sticky-taped on, in the form of upgrades to character abilities and fashion choices. As you hack, slash and otherwise dismember all manner of supernatural ghoulery upon your travels to free a land from the devil or something, you pick up all manner of this stuff. Much of it is ephemera that can be sold or dumped, but every so often you’ll find a funkier glove or hat or whatever which really helps your vulnerability to ouchiness – plus you’ll look so much swankier, darling.

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Things commence calmly enough, but get past the first act and difficulty ramps – even if it’s often the type of BS cheap difficulty whereby a horde of powerful creatures just materialise right on top of you and you’re dead before you can touch anything even vaguely resembling an action button. Yep, mindfully managing those pickups matters.

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Accessing upgrades is a rotational doddle, and once you power up from your initial peashooter mode the fun of eradicating massed throngs like a mythical Arnie is wickedly addictive, as you trundle through increasingly huge maps which skilfully don’t leave you schlepping about in circles mindlessly trying to nut out the current goal.

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Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name.

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