EL SHADDAI: ASCENSION OF THE METATRON
PS3 (also on Xbox 360)
DOOF! DOOF! DOOF! ACIEEEEED! Fab. We innocently pop a disc into our
PS3, only to cause it to discover rave culture AND God. Now it’s
dropped a tab, cranked the stereo to 11 and is demanding a
Frankly, El Shaddai is completely bonkers. Uh, just to
clarify, that’s the game, not the Judaic God.
You’re priestly Enoch, on a mission from God. Unearth seven fallen
angels and zot them before a shit-we-need-an-ark situation evolves.
You’re assisted by a guardian angel claiming his name’s Lucifel, but
we know he’s really Ben Cousins. You’re armed with any of three
weapons – a wicked curved blade, a dart-shooting ring thingy and a
shield/gauntlets combo that blesses you with punch power of biblical
proportions. Stuck with the wrong one and a foe’s got the right one?
Smack the bitch up, nick it, purify it and continue your holy
So far, so standard third-person slasher, yeah? Uh, yeah. However,
there are variations – such as breathtaking silhouetted 2D
What separates the Shaddai from the shitty is its art style.
From dayglo overexposed dreamyscapes to trippy hovering platforms
and neon wonderlands, with assorted religious artefactory seamlessly
folded in along the journey of your Ghibli-like avatar, the visuals
are truly praiseworthy.
Sonics don’t fail us either, with everything from tribal fare that’d
give Peter Gabriel a chubby through to doomy piano morasses that
sound like Tori Amos in a chipper-chopper.
Very much like the subject it’s based on, El Shaddai will
divide opinion. Some will Flandersishly forgive game play trespasses
(repetitiveness, ease of progress via mashing) for the stunning
artistry; others will Homerishly poo-poo that as worshipping false
idols and demand perfect playfulness. Dratarooniedoodily, we never
thought we’d be a Flanders.
Meanwhile, can anybody sling us contact deets for an open-minded