PS3 (also on Xbox 360, PC)
gotcha. Well, actually you were probably about as scared by that as
you’d be by a fluffy bunny snuggling into the wing-pit of a downy
duckling on a cloud, surrounded by marshmallows and babies’ bottoms.
Such a scenario would only be marginally less frightening than
acronymgasmic FEAR 3. This wouldn’t be a drama, except it’s
billed as ‘paralysing paranormal horror’. Yeah, good one marketing
department, like that ‘F3AR’ shit.
It may not be scary – just marginally freaky and weird - but that
doesn’t mean FEAR 3 lacks meritationalperscuityness. It
possesses many pointy-pointy good points, including returning
protagonist Point Man. If you’re not up with the story, it’s rather
convoluted. Basically, beardie-weirdie army kinda guy PM is the
progeny of Alma, who’s a bit... well, really nucking futs. She had
another sprog, Paxton Fettel, who digs chomping human flesh. You and
your creepy cannibal bro - whom you murderated in the first FEAR
(awk-ward!) - unite to find mummy before she pops out another
sibling to split the freaky inheritance with. Or something.
You first play with relative goodie-goodie Point Man, but conquering
each of eight ‘intervals’ unlocks Fettel as playable. So, like
InFamous 2 you can play good,
then e-vil (imagine that how we did when typing and it sounds right
It’s standard FPSiness, but it’s fun and functional. Our only beef’s
the frequency of ‘WTF?!’ deaths – you’re bang-bang-shoot-shooting
and ‘FHWAM!’, goneski. How rude! Weaponry’s pleasingly varied; the
twin machine pistol assault whilst tromping through a megastore that
makes the average Bunnings seem corner shop-like a personal fave.
Inventive multiplayer options add further ‘fuck!’ for your buck.
It may be less scary than bellybutton fluff, but FEAR 3
gripped us enough to forget dinner – and the deli in that
aforementioned megastore had zilch-o to do with it...