POSTED 27/7/13


LEGO CHIMA: LAVAL'S JOURNEY

WB Games
Vita (also on 3DS)

Plastic shoes may be utterly fucking hideous, but we never imagined that they’d cause all-out war.

Yet Crocs are messing with the peaceful equilibrium of all that is Chima, a land where ‘Chi’ isn’t just some hippy-trippy construct, it’s a critical natural resource. For yonks, Lions (note to the anally retentive, capitalisation intended) were keepers of the Chi, being all fair and equitable in its distribution amongst the eight tribes of Chima, which all happen to be animals. With humanistic looks. Umm, ‘anthropomamorphic’ or summat.

But yes, those crocojackas got all greedy-like and screwed with stuff. You begin questing against them as Laval the Lion, who sounds much like a furryfied version of Futurama’s Fry – but more dudebro. You then set out on an adventure akin to, well, most every other LEGO videogame adventure ever.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

While other LEGO games stickytaped a tried-and-loved formula to existing intellectual properties such as Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Lord of the Fries – erm Rings, sorry, we’re hungry... ooh, onion rings! - and Back to the Future, LEGO Chima is based on a new thing from LEGO itself, along the lines of Ninjago, but with approximately 100 percent less ninjatasticness.

Oh, we were only wishful thinking with the BttF mention back there. We’re not so stupid as to think a LEGO Back to the Future game exists. Yet...

Anyway, if you’ve played another LEGO game you’ll dig the vibe, although it is slightly simplified for prime aimed-at toy-set audience appeal. So, while somewhat linear, there’s still exploration and the odd head-scratching – erm, mane-scratching - conundrum here and there to make it less than just a stalk in the park.

Please, save us from Crocs taking over the world! Despite what Barbie may want you to believe, life in plastic is not fantastic.

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