Vita (also on PS3/PSN)
Bigger! Harder! Faster! More! As well as sounding like Jeremy
Clarkson, it’s also pretty much the catchcry for modern life.
So, bugger us if the MotorStorm peeps haven’t jammed a
defiant middle digit skywards and shrunkenated their usual motorised
fare down to pocket-sized, erm, size. Remote control versions of
everything from superminis to muscle cars, buggies to monster trucks
abound, along with 16 tracks that’ll be familiar to fans of the 1:1
scale series. Each appears with various festival challenges, from
straight races to time trials to hot laps to drifting. Do good and
you get stars. Get stars and unlock stuff. Play stuff and get more
stars, thus unlocking more stuff. MMMmmm... sensibleness.
It’s kind of 8-bit classic Micro Machines meets Super
Sprint, drenched in MotorStorm vibe, and stick us up a
pole and call us Magnum if it isn’t bloody ace.
As well as alarmingly addictive racing – seriously, if you’re even
remotely (heh) competitive then you’ll have trouble putting this
down for anything other than a heart attack, and then you’ll likely
grab your USB cable with your last conscious gasp hoping it might
plug into the hospital’s machine that goes ‘ping!’ - erm, sentence
too long now. Uh, yes. You’ve also a toy box to faff in, testing
various antennae-equipped machines, doing stunts, kicking goals,
shooting hoops and generally being playful.
Despite no online multiplayer, there’s a superb ripof... erm, take
on Criterion’s ‘AutoLog’ called ‘Pitwall’. It’s leaderboards a-go-go
as most everything you do is compared to others worldwide and, most
fiendishly, your friends. Smack their ghost up and they’ll be
chasing your spectresque arse around the track hankering sweet
Control can be finicky – we suggest customising to ‘alternate’ with
shoulder buttons for brakes and speed - but once you click then
getting this off you will be a cold, dead hands situation. Machine
go ‘ping!’ now…