NO MAN'S SKY
I miss the Earth so much, I miss my life. It’s lonely out in
Thanks Elts, we’ll take it from here – and apologies
to Bernie T for the wee change there.
It’s not only lonely,
apparently, for judging by the title it’s also sexist. But let’s
leave that can of worms sealed. After all, we may need it for
sustenance later on...
As the magnificent Douglas Adams once
mused, space is big – really big. Never has this observation been
more pertinent than in No Man’s Sky. This sucker has
quintillions of planets to find and explore. Fucking quintillions!
If you’re a completist then you’d better pray for a cure for death
to be discovered pretty bloody quickly, for otherwise you’re
So, you begin proceedings on a procedurally
generated (the fancy-schmancy new way of saying “random”) planet.
You’re spaceship is stuffed, and you have to start hunting and
collecting various minerals and abandoned equipment (assuming you
can fit it in your puny inventory) in order to fix it to get the
heck out of Dodge and hyperspace it to another planet, which will
likely be quite similar.
There’s also virtually nothing in
the way of tutorialism – you’re truly on your own.
point we must observe that the cosmos must have oodles of Devo fans,
as we kept tripping over variously hued Energy Domes. Cool taste,
Anyway, different planets introduce different things.
While you potter about ransacking abandoned (and not so much) space
bases, analysing flora and fauna (some of which is far from
friendly), avoiding drones (or blowing the living crap out of them)
and admiring the pretty scenery, you’ll either be bored shitless or
you’ll come to the realisation that Snaky On Ms is a space
travelling equivalent of walk ’em ups like
Everybody’s Gone to the Rapture.
It may be Elite on Mogadon, but we think we’re falling
for Anon Ms Sky...