If at this juncture you’re
wondering what on Earth a ‘Patapon’ is then don’t fret. You
obviously missed this rhythmic treat back on the PSP – and sadly
you’re hardly alone there. But now that you’re all PS4-equipped you
have the power. The power to pata-pata-pata-pon!
Patapon
is a rhythm game that collided heavily with both a god game and a
strategic outing. You’re the big god-diddily-like deity type, and
these little silhouetted folks are your pixel puppets. Please be
nice to them? They’re ever so sweet and eager to please – all you
have to do is keep the beat.
As such, you stab buttons which
represent taiko drums. Initially there’s ’pata’ and ‘pon’. Master
these and you’ll be presented with ‘don’ and ‘chaka’ – and we’re not
talking Mr ‘No Soul’ Simmons or Ms Khan. In fact, if you’re the
former you won’t even get to that point, as the more you remain
rhythmic, the more your disciples will dig it.
Your aim?
Assail the Jiggadon army – and a bunch of stupid big dumb hurty boss
monsters - all in the name of rhythmic zen.
On top of these
basics, you can go all Dr Frankenstein with collected materials to
concoct new battalion-bolstering Patapon. The more crazy powerful an
army you create, the more (and quicker) those enemies fall to their
defeated knees weeping. Rhythmically, of course.
Being a
remaster, not everything’s woo- yeah, woo-yeah. Cutscenes remain
untouched by human – or Wacom - hands. As such they’re blurrier than
Damon, Graham, Alex and Dave in their heyday. Some scenes are even
weirder, being a mishmash of old and new. The main game screens,
however, look ace.
Many have whined about input lag, but
playing in normal mode on an LG OLED we had no issues. Maybe we’re
just the rhythm royalty that these funky little Patapon peeps
believe us to be?