things are hard. Comprehending Nickelback’s popularity, spelling
(let alone pronouncing) ‘Taumatawhakatangi-hangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu’,
making soufflé that doesn’t go belly-floppy and – according to
Einstein - understanding income tax.
Here’s another for the list, the reincarnated late ’90s arcade/SEGA
Saturn 2D vertical shooter Radiant SIlvergun. Toto, we've a
feeling we're not in Truxton any more...
We’ve been fairly handy at spacey shmups over the past couple of
decades, be they sideways, upways or hybrid. This one broke our
brain. Forget your standard shoot button with a handful of
alternating weapon types coupled with a bomb button, RSG
makes Defender seem like Whac-A-Mole. Every
X-controller button houses a different weapon – if they added more
buttons then Treasure would likely patch in more functions. Mind
you, there’re also numerous combos when combining different buttons.
It’s like memorising Joyce’s Ulysses.
You’ll need to memorise to get anywhere, too – the button functions,
not Ulysses. Whilst hurling fucktonnes of plentifully
frenetic shooter at you, there’s also a heavily puzzler-tinged
strategic element. You’ll just kinda yelp and want to run away upon
first experiencing wave after wave after wave of photon death
stalking you, but as you gradually suss the various functions – and
train your brain to tell fingers to press the right buttons when
needed - improvement comes.
A typical arcade mode bumps options with a story mode; basically the
same, just with the ability to gradually perma-upgrade your arsenal
and mucho added cheese. The old school graphics have been given a
new school injection. Still, if you’re a stickler for authenticity
you can eschew the new shininess for blocky nirvana. Hell, if you’re
that full-on about it you could even saw off the bits between 4:3
and 16:9 on your teev.
Being hard doesn’t mean being blah. Fling off those ‘meh’ shackles
and get your brain dirty.