better ink (INK!), ink about what you’re trying to do to me...
A welcome new IP from the wonderfully bright and shiny folk at
Nintendo, Splatoon sees you become a squid. You’re a
clever, evolved squid, however, as you can morph into a vaguely
human form. You have an ink tank attached to your back, and you go
around spurting its contents everywhere.
Obviously that’s a
gross simplification, for there are rules. While predominantly a
multiplayer game, we’ll start with the single player mode. Newbies
are also advised to do this, as the platformer works as
indoctrination into all things Splatoony. You’ll learn many
nuances, from weapon handling to the neat transmogrification between
squid and biped, and the advantages that each configuration
Once you’ve slammed that – with added bonus levels
if you’re Splatoon amiibo (must... fight... urge... to...
capitalise...) equipped - or just got bored flying solo, you can hit
the main mode, which is a four-vs-four online turf war. Which is
probably why it’s called ‘Turf War’. You and teammates paint the
town of Inkpolis whichever colour you’re assigned, while avoiding
(or splatting to deat- erm, reincarnation) your different coloured
opponents (if one person anywhere brings racism accusations into
this we will officially give up on the world.)
heaps of environments, and only two are active at any time, but it’s
amazing how easily you get sucked into that old “justonemorego!”
mentality. It helps that matches are only three minutes long, and we
never lobby-lurked for more than about 15 seconds before getting
As you level up and accrue currency, you can
funkify your character via shopping. Shopping rocks!
a collision of De Blob, Jet Set Radio and Call
of Duty, Splatoon is the sort of shooter that you’d
expect from Nintendo – and that’s a compliment.
(INK! INK!), let your mind go, let yourself be free...