SUPER SMASH BROS FOR WII U
they come, walking down the street. They get the funniest hooks from
everyone they meet. Hey, hey they’re the monkeys, plumbers,
princesses, turtles, swordsmen, globules, foxes, villagers, space
chicks, hedgehogs, dogs, dragons, Miis, fitness instructors...
Nintendo generally has a rather cuddly reputation – at least
when it comes to their products. That nice plumber that your nanna
would offer a cuppa, that corporate ape toeing the corporate line,
sweet-as princesses and boundless examples of heroism (that’s usually
cute). Yet the Smash Bros line chucks all that out in
favour of letting most every Nintendo character ever – plus a few
ring-ins - beat several shades of snottygobbles out of each other.
But don’t the kids love it! Of course they do, for
when you’re given a game as slick as SSB you can’t help but
show respect, even if the sight of Pac-Man being brutally molested
by a giant, rampaging turtle/lizard thingy is traumatic.
only is SSB a festival of Nintendo characters new and old,
the myriad environments revisit past glories as well, making for
splendid fisticuffular Ninty mashups. You can even make your own
For the uninitiated –
if there are any - SSB’s a beat ’em up that works a teensy
bit differently to the usual “knock ’em down, more please!” formula.
Instead, you weaken foes – locally or online (the latter’s sometimes
wonky) - until you can send them wooshing into space – or at least
off the screen. Win! That percentage rating you see? The higher it
is the worse it is, as that’s how susceptible to damage you are.
Heh, and you thought you were rockin’ it...
Nostalgic-yet-modern, strategic-yet-fun and bulging with Nintendo
compulsiveness that may have you seeking the services of Dr Mario to
break the habit, if you’re wondering where your friends have gone,
they’ve likely hooked into a Super Smash Bros drip. They’re
too busy swingin’, puttin’ everybody down...