THE ORDER: 1886
this the England we want?
Arthurian legend stuff? Check.
Steampunky bits and bobs including blimps? Check. Nikola Tesla and
his wonderful toys? Big check. Muttonchops and various other
beardy-based follicular arrangements that’d make any hipster crumble
in tears of envy? You better believe it, check.
So far, so
yeah – ‘London Calling’. But that feeling soon subsides and we turn
into ‘The Passenger’...
The Order: 1886 ramps the
cinematic up to 11. We’re even talking chunky black bars top and
bottom to give the classic cinemascope look. We don’t mind that.
It also sticks story to the fore. Great characters – including
famed original Arthurian kerniggets many centuries after they
should’ve gone all shuffle, shuffle bye-bye miss mortal coil pie. There’s some serious Nivea shit going on here.
they’re protecting England for Her Madge, and face a whole new
situation of ‘half breeds’. We’re not talking Cher songs either,
rather Lycans. Like AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, ‘Werewolves of
London’. We don’t mind that, either.
Yet ultimately, it’s
standard third-person cover shooter stuff with a fun array of
weapons but very little player involvement. Yep, they wanted to make
a movie so bad that it seems like The Order’s creators
resented the need for interaction. As such pissy, entirely
unnecessary quicktime events rule, while cutscenes clock up more
time than gameplay. To make matters worse, the latter are
completely, totally and utterly unskippable! Not so bad on take one,
but after that? Fuck. Just fuck.
They are, however,
impressively almost seamlessly integrated.
multiplayer nor online, so replayability’s minimal, save for chasing
a handful of bastardly collectibles. Play length’s hardly epic, but
that’s bearable if the experience is good.
The story’s good,
but overall we felt like a hanger-on rather than a player. Probably
because we were.
Sadly, unlike the New Order compilation that
it rips its logo from, The Order: 1886 has very little