PS3/PSN (also on
Xbox 360/XBLA, Wiiware)
You know that feeling when you first meet somebody and they’re the
coolest thing since Sunnyboys, but then they quickly lose that shiny
new lustre and just get on your tits?
Introducing TNT Racers... It absorbs bits of Mario Kart,
Micro Machines and classic cartoon Wacky Races (or
Cel Damage Overdrive in Videogameland), with a smattering of
something we can’t quite put our finger on – you know, when you’re
out of the race once you go offscreen... umm, C64, and when you
crashed your little driver burst into flames and rolled about trying
not to fry. Damn, it’s gonna bug us all night!
Anyway, you select a cartoony vehicle – the sort that have massive
exhaust pipes covering the doors, so you wonder how the fizoink the
driver gets in – and dive into numerous challenges splashed over 18
varying courses. Each race has an aim, from simply winning, to
avoiding things, to ploughing through things or being the first to
score bigly enough.
Aiding you is an astonishing arsenal of armoury gained
drive-through-the-powerup style, ranging from ho-hum oil slicks and
banan… erm, bombs, to mad giant hammers that fliddadit the whole
track. Get left off screen and you’ll resurrect all ghostly, unable
to win but still able to cause havoc.
It’s all accompanied by 1920s-styled music that we endure in
Boardwalk Empire ’cos it suits, but makes us want do a double
Van Gogh hack here. Oboe just ain’t good racing accompaniment! Our other
grievance is that your racer’s plopped mid-screen, so you can
scarcely see what’s coming up – meaning memorise or die.
There is salvation though. The
up-to-four multiplayer mode can be an absolute cack, as you’re doing
battle with smartarse humans, not smartarse AI.
Rally Speedway! Phew, and now we can all get some sleep...