review
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POSTED 23/1/11


ZUMBA FITNESS

505 Games



Urk. If any of those (allegedly) funniest home videos shows somehow obtain footage of us going at this then they’ve snagged a whole season’s worth of ‘entertainment’. So, we got sensible and brought our super-fit, super-Zumbafied friend Tracey in to be our body double. Suck on that, ‘boing!’ sound effect!

When first assailed by the Zumba infomercial, three words gathered in our mind summarising the sensation – South American bootscooting. Having now encountered it we realise it’s actually more involved – South American bootscooting with other dance styles sticky-taped in.

Yep, there’s bits of meringue, cream, raspber... erm, hang on, that’s pavlova. Ah, merengue, salsa (unghhh... nachos!), samba, mambo, flamenco, rumba and even hip-hop and belly-dancing snatches (settle!), all combined into routines accompanied by Latin-heavy songs. Nail it and the instructor you’re mirroring will be green. Do so-so and they’ll be amber. Fuck it up entirely and they’ll go red. This all seems a trifle (yum!) contrary to the apparent aim of Zumba, which is basically expressive freedom. Hmmmmm...

Tracey was impressed that Zumba Fitness uses official songs featured in the classes she attends. We were impressed that when she let loose there was a Latin explosion in our lounge room. So, after enough sequentially-performed routines that'd have us requiring an ambulance, the verdict was...? Not too bad, but...

The ‘but’ being the Kinectified menus, possibly thrown together hastily by some shit-faced bloke the programmers met down the pub. They’re almost entirely unintuitive, and make delving into any of the modes ranging from learning various moves to timed workout routines (alone or online) an abject chore.

Live with the execrable menus and Zumba Fitness is a passable alternative to embarrassing public classes, or being stuck on a junkmail list for eternity. Just beware of hidden cameras...

take me back to the start...

 



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ALL WRITTEN CONTENT COPYRIGHT © AMY FLOWER 2008-2017. GAME IMAGES COURTESY OF RESPECTIVE GAMES COMPANIES.