ADVENTURE TIME: EXPLORE THE DUNGEON BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW!
PS3 (also on
Xbox 360, Wii U, 3DS)
upon a time... NOOOOOOOOOO! WE ALREADY HEARD THAT STORY BEFORE!
We’ve also played this game before. Kinda.
plummet through some baked goods-infused candy time portal, rather
we played Diablo.
Actually, bringing that up here is insulting to Diablo. So
we’ll just have to insult Gauntlet instead. Sorry
Adventure Time, the cartoon series,
is several shades of lumpin’ awesome. This game, we’d dearly love to
type with Lumpy Space Princess ambivalence in our fingers, isn’t.
You have to ponder how anybody could go wrong with such a
wondrous imagination splooge of twisted brilliance to work with, but
it’s happened. So ponder away.
Presented as a kinda 16-bit
homage, you and up to three accomplices variously take the reins of
Finn the Human, Jake the Dog, Marceline the Vampire Queen or
Cinnamon Bun (with others joining in later – you can swap within
in-betweeny bits) and, by order of Princess Bubblegum, hit the
massive (and samey) dungeons beneath Ooo where the land’s enemies
are imprisoned. Lots of them.
But they’re breaking out –
although most seem to have gone unfed as they’re rather skeletal, so
don’t put up much fight. You wield your primary weapon and an array
of secondary ones to take a gradual stream of escapees out. Level
after level, as if trudging slowly over wet sand, until every tenth
one at least mixes things up with a boss battle kinda thing. Woo.
While those in-betweeny bits are fun, as is the occasional spesh
weapon eruption plus the music and real voice actors doing their
real voices – well, real Ooo voices - the actual game is dull, Now
that’s a word nobody could ever associate with Adventure Time,
the cartoon series.
Jake the Dog once mused, “Dude, sucking
at something is the first step towards being sort of good at
something.” We long for future gameificationated redemption.