POSTED 17/12/12


DJMAX TECHNIKA TUNE

Pentavision
Vita

Bleep-bleep-BLOP-BLOP-BLOP-BLORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP...

This and many more – many, many more - wondrously unfamiliar, yet strangely familiar at the same time, choons are stuffed into a wee Vita gamecard thingy in this shrunkenated, portable version of the arcade rhythm smasheroonie DJMax Technika.

We’re talking music of most every style ever given a genretistic moniker, and some more besides. From Spice Girlgasmic K-pop to Beastie Boys wannabes, it’s all here for the stabbing. Wha-wha-what?!

Well, it’s a rhythm game. As such, you poke and paw at both the screen and rear pad as various blobs pop up under a white line, taking a circuitous route from left-to-right at top to right-to-left at bottom in time with something in the song. Yes, if you think you simply have to nail a 4/4 beat then you’re in for another think. Sometimes you’ll stab, sometimes you’ll hold and wiggle your finger, do a double stab and more, aiming to achieve as perfect as possible combo score, and impeccable-as timing. Think of a melange of Elite Beat Agents and DanceDance Revolution – without snappy suits or the plopping down a mat gigantic.

There are three basic difficulties, as well as (initially) three levels of complexity. Curiously we were averaging B and C rankings on easy until jamming into hard pursuing a soft trophy, and nailed the chosen song perfectly, nabbing a hard trophy (whores, us?!). We don’t get the logic, but if you play this and feel decidedly soulless, try bumping up the hard.

Each song has its own video, ranging from typical Saturday morning skimpy-outfitted skyscraper-heeled slut-Barbie  to innumerable trippy, hyper-coloured animations that make The Beatles’ Yellow Submarine look like The Flintstones... in black and white. This can overwhelm what you’re trying to stab along to, but you do tend to adapt.

Challenging yet rewarding, slick yet playful, psychotic yet logical, DJMax Technika Tune is essential stabbing. BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

CLICK THIS!



CLICK THIS!