MOTIONSPORTS: PLAY FOR REAL
Just like Sunday arvo telly, we bring you sport, sport and more
bloody sport. Hey, there’s a motion controller pointing at us, so
we’ve gotsta be athletic, yeah? Rah!
Crossing one third of a path with its main competitor for sporty
bums off seats, Kinect
Sports, Motionsports features soccer and boxing, plus
American football, hang gliding, skiing and gettin’ down and horsey
with equestrian events.
Hitting those in order, soccer's basically kicking and/or
defending, like penalties and even a kind of Arkanoid-esque
block-bashing thing. Boxing’s like any other boxing game – punch,
duck, defend, punch more, say “duh!”.
Yankee footy involves bits from the game – running, ducking,
jumping, passing etc - but nothing much like real meathead chess.
Hang gliding lets you go all The Man from Hong Kong in your
lounge, blowing it all sky high as you steer your pointy kite (so
pointy-pointy) about, trying not to bite the
Skiing is as it sounds – go that way really fast, if something gets
in your way turn. The horsey stuff’s essentially a royal family
simulator, and had us rummaging about for two halves of coconuts to
An OK range, to be sure, and they all look ace. However, there seems to be a blockage
between the game and the Kinect, for trying to get some moves
registering can be more frustrating than listening to a fuckwitted
sports commentator. Oh yeah, there’s one of them too, who has around
one putdown per event that he repeats ad infinitum when you
play like cack. Joy! Add having to replay events until you amass
enough points to unlock more and frustration’s likely to consume
even the most patient couch-jock.
Disappointingly, Motionsports is rather worthless and weak.
Now drop and give us 20!