review
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POSTED 8/1/11


MOTIONSPORTS: PLAY FOR REAL

Ubisoft
Xbox 360/Kinect

Just like Sunday arvo telly, we bring you sport, sport and more bloody sport. Hey, there’s a motion controller pointing at us, so we’ve gotsta be athletic, yeah? Rah!

Crossing one third of a path with its main competitor for sporty bums off seats, Kinect Sports, Motionsports features soccer and boxing, plus American football, hang gliding, skiing and gettin’ down and horsey with equestrian events.

Hitting those in order, soccer's basically kicking and/or defending, like penalties and even a kind of Arkanoid-esque block-bashing thing. Boxing’s like any other boxing game – punch, duck, defend, punch more, say “duh!”.

Yankee footy involves bits from the game – running, ducking, jumping, passing etc - but nothing much like real meathead chess. Hang gliding lets you go all The Man from Hong Kong in your lounge, blowing it all sky high as you steer your pointy kite (so pointy-pointy) about, trying not to bite the ground.

Skiing is as it sounds – go that way really fast, if something gets in your way turn. The horsey stuff’s essentially a royal family simulator, and had us rummaging about for two halves of coconuts to bang together.

An OK range, to be sure, and they all look ace. However, there seems to be a blockage between the game and the Kinect, for trying to get some moves registering can be more frustrating than listening to a fuckwitted sports commentator. Oh yeah, there’s one of them too, who has around one putdown per event that he repeats ad infinitum when you play like cack. Joy! Add having to replay events until you amass enough points to unlock more and frustration’s likely to consume even the most patient couch-jock.

Disappointingly, Motionsports is rather worthless and weak. Now drop and give us 20!
 
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ALL WRITTEN CONTENT COPYRIGHT © AMY FLOWER 2008-2017. GAME IMAGES COURTESY OF RESPECTIVE GAMES COMPANIES.