SAINTS ROW IV
Who you callin’ a PUSA, beeyatch?!
Oh shit yeah, the Saints
is gone all presidential! Hug a massive mofo nucular missile
(accompanied, hilariously, by Aerosmith’s ‘I Don’t Want to Miss a
Thing’) and it’s amazing where it can git you. Leader of the ‘free
world’ – yeah - and cushy White Crib beddybobos. But then fucking
aliens beam down and party crash. Now was that civilised? No,
Injected into a Matrix-like world by
a well-spoken yet hideously pockmarked space captor, things start
all Leave it to Beaver-like before you kick-ass your way
back to Steelport-as-you-know-it. Well, a virtual one. Things become
a little more familiar – a little - as copious batshit-bonkers
missions await. Yeah, you jack vehicles, eradicate alien
strongholds, climb towers and shit, but they’re small potatoes
(harmonise now, “Potatoes!”).
seemingly nabbed from InFamous’
rather spritely protagonist, add new dimensions of ability – and
silliness. It could be argued that this takes away many joys – like
vehicular amassment - but it could also be argued that they’re the
Saints, mofo, and they’ll do what they fuckin’ want! Seriously, want
collectibles? Thousands of ’em (literally – well, over a thousand at
least). Nutso weaponry? Try speaking softly and carrying a big
frickin’ dubstep gun to wubwubwub suckas into, erm, somewhere
dubsteppy. Wanna eschew main space questiness for hangin’
Stockport-style? It’ll work for a while, UFO piloting and all.
Saints Row has never taken things seriously, and has
been better for it, with only serious glitchiness causing
downfalliness. This fourth incarnation’s hardly gonna graduate all
dux-like in avoiding that hiccupitude, but it’s mucho acer than
Saints Row: The Third.
With the perfectly preposterous alien invasion schtick it’s also
even more of a cack. Fun, but in no sense civilised – yeah!
After all, the Saints have never advocated war, except as a means of