Listen, sport! Now we donít mean that in a macho-posturing,
you-scratched-my-bumper-bar-you-bastard kind of way, rather in more
of a ďTake heed, weíre talking about sporting endeavoursĒ fashion.
Yes, itís a little known fact that itís actually law that a new
console cannot hit the shops without a sports compendium ready to
rock. Strangely, despite the pack-in mega-success of Wii Sports
on the Wii without a ĎUí, Nintendo seemingly couldnít be arsed
making one for this launch. But Ubisoft did Ė yay?
Sports Connection gathers together six endeavours that in
the real world require a modicum of fitness. Well, five and golf Ė
so thatís tennis, baseball, soccer, gridiron and karting.
First up, you need a MotionPlussed-up Wiimote, as the GamePad canít
deal alone. Second up, even if you have one its movements seem to be
ignored half the time. Third up, that second point will piss you
off. A lot.
Briefly summarising, for thatís what we do, tennis is simplified to
basically swiping to hit the ball when itís near. Baseball
alternates between hitting (WiiMote) and pitching/fielding (GamePad)
and is kinda fun. Soccerís just like FIFA, except
execrable. Youíve little control and bonus penalty shootouts are
pretty boring. Speaking of pretty, karting isnít. Either controller
is wielded like a steering wheel. Both controls suck at it.
Gridironís as inexplicable as ever to us non-American types, and it
seems to expect strategies based on what the opponents are planning
when you canít actually see them. Oops. Golfís also pretty basic,
but hey, itís the best golf currently on Wii U!
We expect simplicity in such a collection, and thatís what we get.
But we also expect some atmosphere, ease of use and more fun.
Diehard sports buffs will get something out of it, but dear Aunty
Mavis wonít Ė and that was what Nintendo nailed so pinpointily with