It’s taken way too long, but finally John M Phillips’ genius
rotating platform puzzler has made its way to the 21st century!
What’s that? O...
Yes, add a single vowel and it’s
apparently OK to confuse those who appreciate classic
Nebulous is a platform-less puzzler that doesn’t
deserve to be thought of in the same bonce-bubble as the one that
didn’t contain an ‘o’.
In a nicely presented space setting,
you’re charged with rescuing bubble-boy astronaut Dash Johnson, over
and over and fucking over again. This takes place within a box full
of some manoeuvrable things, and some not manoeuvrable things,
which – ooh joy - may be joined to more boxes full of stuff.
Many interesting and important things have been put into boxes over
the years. This foul-mouthed bastard of an astronaut isn’t one of
them. You’re given NFI as to what to do with the ever increasing
piles of junk that you can manipulate, yet you cop an earful if you
stuff up. Literally comparing the player to shit is scarcely
a wise way to endear anybody to your game – actually it’s
Nebulous is just a decidedly
average melange of bits
from gravity-based puzzlers the likes of Lemmings,
Hg and myriad other OK brain teasers. Plus, bonus bugs! We
manoeuvrable thing escape its box (perhaps trying to escape the
game itself?) and bam, restart. Yay.
From the outset Nebulous is a
chore. Oh dear, I didn’t place that piece – via DualShock - to the
precise pixel spot required. OK, I’ll move it slightly, let ragdoll
Dash tumble 4 me again and see if it works this time. Hint:
After clearing the first set of levels, Dash drops
a tirade that begins with, “This is no longer fun.” Dash, mate,
you’re wrong. It was never fun.
Maybe Namazu will do better
with their next game, Grande Theft Auto...?